Writing Your Own Vows

summer wedding

Your wedding vows are the most personal part of the ceremony.  They reflect your relationship and what your union represents.  So, if traditional vows are not your style, here is a guide to help you and your hubby-to-be find a personal way to promise forever.

What is it about him?

What made you fall in love in the first place?  Take a trip to the beginning.  Was there an initial attraction, or did it take him time to warm your heart?   Start there!  Share what drew you together, and then discuss how your love has grown deeper.  Maybe it was his strapping good looks or his competitive spirit on the basketball court. Or, maybe it was his ability to solve an impossible physics problem within a short five minutes.  What gave you those butterfly feelings that took you back to middle school?  Write them down and open your vows with those special memories.

How do you view marriage?

When you are married, it is important to continue doing the things you love together. Tell him how you want to continue sharing life, how you will guide him through hard times, be his shoulder to cry on, find joy with him, etc.  Figure out what you value in marriage and find a place to share these things in your vows.

It is often helpful to seek guidance from an admiral couple about what has made their union such a success. Take note of what you would like to mirror in your relationship and let your spouse know these things are important to you too.

Make your promises

Now that you have shared your values and the things you love about him, it’s time to make him some promises!  How are you going to keep the spark alive?  Promise him that you will try every day to integrate your ideals of a strong marriage into your relationship.  Even promise him that you will continue those one-on-one basketball games when life gets too hectic!  Some promises will be deep and others will be light-hearted, yet all are meaningful.

Although your vows should be honest and deep, keep them brief!  You won’t regret sharing this intimate moment with your spouse and the support of friends and family.